Episode 11
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[00:00:00] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Welcome back to the Women in Writing Podcast. This is another solo episode with me, the founder of the Women in Writing Podcast, Christina, and I'm also a six figure freelance writer and a freelance writing coach, especially for women. But for everyone who wants to learn the craft and the magic of freelance writing, and today's episode is really special.
It's really personal. And it's like a little bit embarrassing too, because it's about being in depth, it's about financial issues, and it's about me creating. this new life for myself, using my craft and my talent of writing to get out of that slump [00:01:00] and out of this like crazy situation in my life.
I had two amazing guests lined up for last Friday, but unfortunately I got sick over the weekend. So this episode is two days delayed and I had to postpone my amazing podcast guests for this week because my voice was just not there. I didn't feel good. And yeah. My husband came back after two months of working on a different continent in the US.
He is from the US. I'm from Germany originally, but we both live in the UK right now. That's our home. What we chose for us to be like the best place for us to raise our daughter. So yeah, it was a crazy intense time and I think like with him coming back, it was like this bodily reaction of kind of getting sick after a long period of Kind of like being not really under stress, but being really like under pressure because when you work as a freelancer with a two and a half year old at home and three [00:02:00] dogs, you can imagine that things are not always super easy.
And that's what we're going to talk about today as well, times that are difficult. And trigger warning here. If talking about financial debt triggers you, you might not want to listen to this episode For me, it was always very much related to my self worth and to me feeling anxious around money and I was in the lucky situation that I grew up in a family where we didn't really have A lot of financial struggles with me growing up.
We had like always enough food on the table and everything was good. My parents were working hard, but they still had time, to take us on a vacation once in a while. And like we had a good life growing up. But [00:03:00] what I realized pretty early on is that I didn't really get taught a lot of like financial literacy or like financially.
Like building a financially stable life because it was like always my dad who took care of the finances and still to this day my parents are married for like over 40 years now and My mom doesn't have access really to her bank account She doesn't know how to do online banking and like it's funny that I share that like it's crazy how It's like just one generation away.
But still, my dad is the one who takes care of the finances and who is also like the main breadwinner. But, if you are a woman listening, Sometimes the situation can be difficult because if you're, first of all, if you're young and you, if you're not taught to really how to handle and manage your money correctly, that's a big learning experience when you grow up.
And when I [00:04:00] had like my first jobs and like I was working pretty early for those of you who don't know, we have a family business. And yeah, That meant a lot of work and it's in our family since generations and generations, which is very beautiful and I managed it to for a while of my life, but it really led to burnout and it really led to a life where I thought.
Hey, I don't want to live like that. I want to have flexibility. I want to have freedom. I want to do something I love. And that ultimately brought me to writing. And with writing, I say freelance writing. On my Women in Writing podcast, I'm talking to women that published books that have like publishing agencies or that are really known for their work.
But also I want to have a conversation with or I do have conversations with a lot of freelancers as well. And trust me on [00:05:00] that, a hundred percent, that's my belief, what I learned, especially over the last years, if you want to create a career and a full time income, or even more than a full time income writing, you can, no matter where you stand right now.
If you have the passion for writing and obviously also a certain talent, but I think like passion and talent goes hand in hand. then it will be easy for you to build the skills. And some of us, including myself, get this wrong. It's not for you like building all the skills first before you get paid.
You really build the skills while you do it. Like it's learning as you do it. Obviously, when you have your first clients, you want to Create like good value for them, like it's in the conversation and I don't want to go too deep into this topic because, it's about like conversation, it's about like really focusing on what the client needs, like doing your best providing, [00:06:00] not samples, but really providing a structure before.
And I also talk about how to get your first writing job and your first writing gigs and how to find out what is your niche. I'm not saying everyone needs to niche down because I always say if you just love writing and you want to make money. doing this. And I had a great chat with another amazing lady earlier today, and she made money with all kinds of writing.
And so did I in the past, then you can create this, but this is not the podcast to cover this. If you want to go more into this topic, join my group, my free Facebook group. I'll pop the link below. I'll book a free call with me directly. It's 15 minutes for free. Just because I want to have a conversation with you, how I can help.
I want to give you some pointers, some tips. And I'm honestly here to inspire like this is my mission. I want to inspire. And that's why I also record this podcast episode where I go deep into depth and how it made me feel. So [00:07:00] back in 2016, my life. Was pretty shit. Sorry to say it like this. I was 31 years old So you can calculate how old I am now.
I'm almost 39. I will be 39 in spring Yes, I was 31 years old and I was in the situation where I thought I had everything figured out I was working in the family business like I shared before I was married To a man that I thought was good for me because he had the right job and I was Overworked and I was just in a situation where I was so unhappy.
I was unhappy. I was unhealthy I had a lady that started to work for us She's still our assistant and she became like like my second mom and she said to me I was always asking myself you're like this young And it feels like there's no soul living in this body, [00:08:00] like it feels like you do everything for others and you don't not even know who you are.
And I was at this point and everything came together. I did my studies for my masters of business administration here in England, actually, because I wanted to be best prepared for everything in the business, in the family business, learning all the traits, all the skills. And with that course, I also had a great personal development mentor and he just blew my mind like I learned so much from him.
And I also learned that I was on a pretty unhealthy path. So we didn't have kids yet. We planned kids, but we didn't have kids yet. And I was at this point of my life where we traveled actually. For like a study project and I was talking with the other students and they were like, I was like the youngest in the course, but they all had like their families, their kids, they had their [00:09:00] careers and their lives figured out and they all seemed pretty happy and I felt like something is wrong, cannot talk to my husband, like there was so many issues.
So Everything came together and I was just questioning my whole life on the flight back and I was just crying and crying because I knew I had to change a lot to become happy. I wasn't in a career that fulfilled me. I was thinking of writing a lot because, I started writing back in 2008.
So that means while I had this career, I always did freelance writing on the side. I always worked on projects that I found, on content. de. Or, text broker and I worked for different clients. I wrote short stories, I wrote blog posts and websites and SEO and I just liked it and I just kept going, not really for the money because there was not a whole lot of money in that for me because I didn't, dedicate my career to it, but just, I just kept going because I love the writing.
And then, [00:10:00] yeah, back in 2016, I was like, I want to do this. I want to write. But I also need to turn my life around. I came to that moment where I really said, Okay, I'll not work right now. I will focus on my master's, I will leave the country for a little bit, because our friends, family friends in America, they offered me to stay with them for two and a half, three months, so I could finish my dissertation for my master's.
And I could just, come like to my senses a little bit and think about what I want to do with my life. And then everything crumbled. I went through a really. painful breakup through a really painful divorce. And maybe you're familiar with this situation. You feel like You're not worthy.
You feel like you lose a lot of friends because you go through that breakup and even though it's the right thing to do. It's still so hard because obviously there's still Feelings involved and then I was judged by my family and like leaving the family [00:11:00] business and I was then in massive debt just because I was traveling.
I was not working. It was not like I made a lot amount of money, like a huge amount of money. I didn't make a lot just because it was also for me, like my duty to serve, like the legacy of that family business. And I didn't know what to do with myself. I Was basically in America these three months, recovering from burnout, still wrote my dissertation, planned my life, and I was a mess.
I was really a mess. And some of you might be familiar with the term Saturn Return. And there's also an amazing podcast with Keggy Dunlop. She's from the UK as well. And she's, she has a huge following. She's amazing. I think she was a musician or something before as well, but she is really into astrology.
And it really came to that point where I had to [00:12:00] decide if I want to live this life for the rest of my life, or if I changed. So from the massive debt, I just felt and the divorce and everything that was going on, I felt so unworthy. I felt I'm not worth it. I'm not worth to, I don't deserve love, my family.
Kind of supported me, but didn't because we also from a small village and they also said, Oh, what will the people say, everyone's talking about you. And now you're not here. Now you're in America. And on top of that, which actually saved my life. On top of that, during these three months in America, I met a guy that is now my husband, now the father of a little daughter and doggie daddy and I just met this amazing guy and he saved my life in so many ways.
Like I was instantly drawn to him. It was not that I was looking for someone. It was [00:13:00] like a lot of times in these situations and you know how it is like you just want to figure out your stuff alone and you just want to be alone and like get to know you, get to know yourself, get to know what you want.
But I just was drawn to him. And I was like, what should I do? I'm, I have my ticket going back to Germany, I was supposed to start back in the family business and work it out. And obviously, I had to go back and I couldn't think of any career really. that fulfilled me where I had the flexibility to go back and forth and do some stuff for the family business so I don't leave them alone and not support them at all.
But we're also at the flexibility to make money to travel to see this guy like this amazing Spencer is his name. He's my, like I said, my wonderful husband to be with. Spetzer and just give that like super young love a chance to grow and to see if we could work out and [00:14:00] as you know now we did, but back then in 2016, 2017, I felt bad and I also felt bad towards my ex husband because like I said, it wasn't planned.
It was never like I cheated on him or anything and it was clear for both of us that we had to break up, but obviously like again, like still it's painful. And the depth was something on top of me that really weighed me down. I had, sometimes I had thoughts like, sometimes I had these thoughts that maybe it would be better if I wouldn't be here anymore.
Like I had these thoughts of I just make everyone unhappy. I don't know what to do, but what kept me going was actually Writing. I did some journaling. I did a lot of inner work. And over the years, and you will see that also when you follow my Instagram, I will dedicate, a highlighted story just to my coaches like over the years [00:15:00] and inspired by that first personal development mentor.
Chris Dalton is his name actually from Henley business school here in the UK. I just went down that road of working with different mentors to became that person that I am now, especially now for my coaching, inspiring other women. But back then, 2016, 2017, like I said, journaling was the big thing for me.
Journaling really helped me heal. It helped me to process. It helped me to understand different things. It helped me to really figure things out because like I said, it's, it was hard. It was really hard. And I was at this point also in 2017 where I thought, okay, how do I give that a shot? So basically. Even though I was in debt, I took out a loan [00:16:00] to finance my life a little bit more because I didn't really make money, like I said, from the family business anymore.
And I still, was flying back and forth to be there for my family. And I knew that time was running out. Maybe you know a situation like that in your own life where, like finances can stress you so much that you wake up in the middle of the night and that you think like, how should I pay for this and that?
Like how should I do that? And especially for me being in America on then a student visa, I was not allowed to work. Like I was not allowed to work. But obviously I knew I could make money freelance writing at least a little bit and this is really how or when writing saved my life because I finally took it serious and I said Either this works out or I might have to go back because the pressure just [00:17:00] was too much and as much as I wanted to give this love a chance and I knew like after a couple of months hey, he's a good guy, we didn't move in together right away or something, but we like really got close like also emotionally and I got to know his family and I got to know his friends and that says a lot about a person as well.
And I was at this point where I said, Okay, this could be my future. This could be my savior, like God has a plan for me and for us, for both of us, like he came out of a similar situation. And the writing was really the thing that saved me because I figured it out, because I had to go all in to figure it out.
So what did I do? The practical steps. from before making a maximum of, I think it was like 450 a month from freelance writing because I just did it on the side, like a little bit, besides my career, really [00:18:00] going all in and really saying, Hey. I'm taking this as a professional. I'm not only this individual, but I'm also a brand.
I'm a brand. I saw myself as a professional writer. I wrote down, what are my values? And for me, it was important to like over deliver, to communicate openly and directly with the client, so I understand what they want and to deliver my. Partial deliveries on time, which means, like When a client books with you that I say, Hey, this is the structure.
This is what I want to do. Is that fine? Do you have feedback? And I was really the one, even if it was hard for me, like to talk to a client on the phone at the beginning, but I was the one who said Hey, let's just jump on the phone instead of just emailing, like just talk things through. Because sometimes when you talk to someone, it's just such a different vibe and you understand things differently.
So it was for me [00:19:00] really. Life saving to have that backup of the personal development and creating the self confidence out of this situation where I felt so less worth and I felt so much in a slump and so much like letting everyone down and I really created this momentum by having my first clients and getting good feedback and getting signed with not only one but three professional agencies.
So that's what I did. I discovered over the past, like over the years, freelance writing that I really love. researching. I want to write about facts. As much as I love creative writing creating short stories, website contents, whatever, I really wanted to have facts on the table because I was taught also in [00:20:00] business school critical thinking I have to look at the facts, like what is true and what not.
So I started to love reading academic journals and articles and whatever was out there. And I love to reflect on that in my writing and obviously add citations then to my writing to honor the people who did the original research and kind of bring everything together. And then it became so meaningful because I got known for that as I was working for professional agencies.
And as I was becoming that, that's what I always say to my clients as well, becoming that smaller fish, instead of being that small fish, like that sardine in a huge ocean in the Atlantic or the Pacific, like of upwork fiber and you name it, or even like social media where you don't even know. If you get paid or if it's a scam, hey, text me on telegram, like translate the whatever or write 25 pages until tomorrow and then I [00:21:00] pay you maybe not, or you will never hear from me again.
I was just sick and tired because I was also like, screwed in the past. Online, you never know what's out there, so be careful. But I really turned it around with that little spark of confidence that I had. That I got hired as a. bIg fish in a tiny ocean of a professional agency. And like I said, not only one, but three.
And it happened for me in one week. But after applying for month and month, so I was really using my LinkedIn. I was applying for different writing jobs. I was Optimizing everything and this is what I teach actually in my wealthy writers program. I like reloaded Wealthy writers 2. 0 will be released in just one or two weeks I can't wait for that because I learned so much from my clients over the past year [00:22:00] and I just love helping people and, supporting them on their journey.
And then it's for them and for you if you want to jump in a shortcut to your own six figure freelance writing business. So it's not easy and it was not easy for me, but it worked out and then everything changed. It's my life changed. My life changed completely. I was able to make money from wherever. I was proud of myself.
I was able to afford a life there. I was able to really give it a chance and after three years or three and a half years of us living in America together and after my back then boyfriend proposed to me and became my fiance, we actually moved to Germany for a while to also like, like for me still being a writer because obviously it's super flexible.
I can work from wherever still to that day. And then Yeah, we figured [00:23:00] it out from there. Took care of the family business. It's not it's not like things are easy sometimes and you will face that if you grow in your freelance writing career. It's like new level, new devil, yes, you have to be on time, yes, sometimes you don't feel like writing, but you know exactly what you're doing and for me, this trade off for me going so deep into like depth and like being in situations that were not as nice and then being so successful after trying and not giving up, that taught me so much.
And here's another honest share just to conclude this very personal episode as well. I was in a similar situation last year as well. I had to go deep into depth to create this coaching business. And of course, you could say, Christina, you know how to make money writing. And yes, that's true.
But for me, like I said, my husband works in America a lot [00:24:00] being basically alone with a toddler that doesn't go to nursery quite yet, or daycare, not having family around me not really having a lot of support. Yes, I could focus on writing and make money. But I wanted to do something else. I wanted to go through this transition again, actually like after seven years and Isn't it like that we change our life every seven years and that's what I taught was taught also from Tony Robbins and others and I went deep into the depth to like into depth to find out how to be a coach Because when I became a mom, I thought like motherhood and working from home, having a flexible job is just so amazing, it's just really great.
And of course, I could have just stick to my writing, make good money, keep it all to myself. But I wanted to do it for others as well. And I'm not Mother Teresa or whatever. But I just love people. And [00:25:00] I love coaching and I love I was just on a coaching call with my clients and one of my clients got signed with a new agency.
She does really well. It's such a relief because she also tried for a couple of months and she's now at that point where she is just shining. Like actually she only tried for a couple of weeks, but in my, it feels longer if you're in this like period of applying or whatever. Last thing I want to say sometimes we have to go through transitions and transitions can be hard with transitions it's that part of the of life or like the part of the pendulum where we have to go into The darkness where we have to go into the cave where we have to learn where we have to grow where we have to get out of it and why was I in debt because I spent a lot of money on coaching and mentoring and I feel And this is what saved me the first time and also now [00:26:00] this time Getting support from other people.
It's really getting support from other people having someone that through it. Like myself, I figured it out the hard way so I can give you a shortcut. And that's the same with other people. The coaches I hired, they went through marketing funnels and figuring out how to frame and build a community and stuff like that.
And I was not good at, I didn't know a lot about that because I'm not really the marketing person. Yes, I have my master's and stuff, but it's not like we did like tons of like marketing, especially like social media and whatever. And me like, and especially as writers, we can be like introverted, but me really getting out there and having that Instagram stage, showing my face online, whatever, it was a transition period, but it was so worth it.
My clients see results and I'm just happy for them and I can grow. So this was a very personal solo [00:27:00] episode talking about depth and crazy times in life and my personal story. I hope I didn't bore you with it. and I'm excited to see you and hear you in the next episode. I'm excited what you think.
Please rate it. Please share it. And I speak to you very soon. I pop my information below. If you need anything, reach out to me anytime. I'm excited that you're in this world. I'm excited that you found this podcast and lots of love from England.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
